TBBCF Press Release Life After the Storm

Hardly anything in life is more stressful than a scary diagnosis: sitting across from a doctor who is telling you that the test results came back, and yes, it is cancer.

It's enough to send chills down your spine, just thinking of it.

And yet, according to Melissa Burns of Guilford, a woman who's lived through that moment, the most difficult part of the breast cancer journey begins when the medical treatment ends.

"Everyone expects you to be fine again, back to the way you were before," says Burns. "But you've been in battle mode for months, and everything has changed. Plus, you've been devastated. Poison has been pumped through your body. Your core has been changed, and it takes a long time to find your way back. You start to feel guilty if you can't just jump back to normalcy. It feels like nobody understands. You feel isolated once again, and alone."

Burns, a breast cancer survivor in her 30s who runs "In the PINK," a support group in Guilford for women under 50 who have breast cancer, decided that something needed to be done to help ease this sense of post-treatment isolation. Then last fall, she met Jill Nesi, a Madison songwriter, while both were training for the 26.2-mile walk to benefit the Terri Brodeur Breast Cancer Foundation.

Nesi doesn't have breast cancer, but she was so moved by the experience of hearing the stories of the women there that, after the walk, she went home and wrote a song about them. "I just wanted to do something to help them," says Nesi. "There was such a positive spirit, and also such sadness there. It was a mixed blessing. It really showed me that cancer is something you can survive, and you can survive it by having support."

She met with Burns, whom she'd met at the training sessions for the walk, and sang her the song and asked for help with the lyrics.

"When she sang me the song, we both cried," recalls Burns. "It is such a beautiful and moving song. And Jill told me she wanted to donate it to the Terri Brodeur Foundation for them to use."

It wasn't long before the two women decided to join forces and help get the word out about what life is like after breast cancer. Burns told Nesi her own story: She had been diagnosed with stage 2 invasive breast cancer when she was 32 years old, and 19 weeks' pregnant with her second child. She had only been married for two years. By the time she gave birth to her baby, who was born six weeks early, she'd already had a mastectomy and four rounds of chemotherapy. Another four rounds of chemo and extensive reconstructive surgery was still to follow.

"I'm the type of person that when something bad happens to me, I have to find the good part of it," Burns says. "I started to reach out to other young women who were struggling like I was. Pretty soon doctors were sending their young patients to talk to me, and I decided to start a networking group especially for women who were young and who were dealing with different issues than the older women who are facing breast cancer. That's how In the PINK started. It's grown from six women to over 40."

Burns and Nesi decided they'd create a documentary film about the entire experience of life after cancer, and they'd call it "After the Storm."

"The film is going to address all the issues young women with cancer face," Burns says. "In my breast cancer group, we all talk about how we have to keep things normal for our children. In this age group, we have so much to do, so many people are counting on us. It's hard to just stop and focus on yourself. And if you've come through a time of needing treatment, then you feel guilty if everybody else picked up so much slack, and you want to get back to it."

The film will follow five women as they talk at a networking party, and then as they leave the party and go into their lives. It will concentrate, with humor and compassion, on the struggles they face and how they handle the issues that come up, including infertility, children's reactions, and their own ever-present fear of recurrence.

"This part of the journey requires amazing strength and grace," Burns says, "and the film will show how women's desire to help each other aids them in their survival. What I have learned from being in this group (of young survivors) is that you can continue to live with this diagnosis. It's like any chronic illness, not a death sentence. You have to be proactive and take care of yourself, but you can still live your life, still keep busy and maintain your friendships. These women have taught me so much."

Now that they have the idea, both Burns and Nesi have embarked on a fund-raising adventure. They calculated it will cost $182,000 to produce the film, and armed with that figure, they started visiting merchants in their towns to see how they could raise the money.

"People have been just incredible," says Burns. "As we would go and talk to merchants and businesses, they would say, 'What do you need?' We couldn't believe how many people have been touched by cancer, and who want to help us get the word out."

The beginning fund-raiser will take place on April 24, when Rituals Spa and Medical Aesthetic Center donates a portion of its proceeds from the gala opening of its new med-spa to support the Terri Brodeur Breast Cancer Foundation and "Life After the Storm."

Then, on May 8, Quattro's Restaurant in Guilford will have "Pink Ladies Night," beginning at 7 p.m., a kick-off event that will celebrate with cocktails and hors d'oeuvres. The public is invited. In May, many local businesses have donated a portion of their sales to support the production of the film, including Urbane Hair Salon, Station One Salon in Clinton, Rituals Spa, Quizno's in Guilford, Quattro's, The Guilford Greenery, Cilantro Specialty Foods in Guilford, Bishop's Orchards, Starbucks and Dunkin' Donuts.

From 4-6 p.m. on June 1, Madison will celebrate "Light the Night PINK," a townwide celebration run by Bellaperlina, which will include raffles from local businesses and contributions from sales for those hours. Singing groups from Guilford High School and Daniel Hand High School in Madison will stroll and sing, vendors will provide food and drinks, and the evening will culminate with an uplifting ceremony at Café Allegre, with Ann Nyberg from Channel 8 as the master of ceremonies.

The summer will feature a lobsterbake and a golf tournament as well, and, as Burns says, more events are being planned every day.

"We've been just amazed by all the support," says Burns. "Everyone from students at the high school to retailers have joined in and want to help this cause."

For more information, or to volunteer to help, or donate money, call Melissa Burns at (203) 458-3314.